My story is provocative and poignant as it details a life transformation unexpected in my wildest dreams. It speaks to my life and love of/for another woman, a metamorphosis that took place following my chance encounter with Kate at a prayer meeting in August of 1973. Husbands, children, family, nor friends would be spared the fury of the tumultuous and devastating storms this chance meeting would elicit, or the fall out that would surely ensue.
It speaks to my thunderous fall from the insidious and slowly crumbling pedestal on which my family, friends and prayer partners had placed both Kate and me on seeing us as perfect wives, mothers and friends. For a time, we were drawn to the depths of hell where the painful existence of living double lives exacted a horrendous toll on our psyches. We were living a lie and our spirits were shriveling and dying little by little.
Mine is a riveting and enduring story, as it reveals the struggle, tragedy and triumph of two women who, having fallen from grace, didn’t know if they’d ever recover and learn to fly again. It captures succinctly the myriad questions that plagued our minds and hearts. How could this happen? Why us? What do we do now? We had husbands, children, beautiful homes, families, friends and all the security life could offer.
Were we willing to risk it all for the seduction of an unexpected and unsought after love that knew no boundaries? Would we sacrifice this love that had found us, for our husbands and children, or would we choose the road less traveled, a road that would demand the absolute truth at every turn; a path that would entail the execution, or the death of blame and excuses, in exchange for trust and faith in ourselves and the unknown?
It appeared our images, once graced by love, were in the process of being destroyed by love; a love we couldn’t explain, nor understand.Even the years of spiritual learning and growth that Kate and I had enjoyed from the first we met, seemed all too fruitless as we faced the fearful unknown.
This is a story of an incredible and often miraculous journey of a life transformation that proved and challenged my mind and spirit. It is a powerful, yet painful story of faith, love, tough choices and learning to fly again. My life’s journey is an emotionally charged story that spans the bridge between love and loathing, sadness and joy, anger and understanding and perhaps in the final analysis respect for two women, who in the face of painful choices, wrought with dire consequences, did not choose the path of least resistance.
My loving another woman broke all the rules and crossed the boundaries of what is acceptable in society and what is not. It’s much more than a love story. It speaks to the risks, responsibility and the ridding oneself of fears; it’s about baring the truth with all the good, bad and ugly that it personifies; moreover, it’s a spiritual journey that not only defies, but soars above reason and logic!
Mine is a life-changing story that showed me the strength of the human spirit when confronted with adversity, indecision, fear and the seemingly insurmountable obstacles and choices that are often and unexpectedly laid at our feet as we journey through life.
I discovered the authentic truth of God’s love for me in spite of my circumstances. When my life was thrown off track, unraveling and falling apart, I realized the power of truth, trust, faith and the indomitable spirit within. The proof of my trust in self and a power greater reflected a God whose vision penetrated far beneath my physical being, to my mind, heart and spirit. As I put one foot in front of the other, facing a world unknown to me, it was clear that God didn’t base His love on “what” I was, but rather “who” I was, and how much I was willing to trust Him.
I’ve learned to approach all problems, obstacles and events from the world behind my eyes, where the essence of each one of us dwells. I’ve discovered that living my authentic truth and best life, enables me to give the best of who I am to others. My greatest lesson has been learning to listen to my spirit for guidance, rather than the ego that would attempt to manipulate and control my life’s journey.
Today, thirty-nine years later, Kate and I continue to grow together. We’ve learned the value of living from our essence or spirit. The world outside ourselves holds no power unless we give it permission. We’ve realized that “our thoughts will take us anywhere we want to go, or keep us from getting there.” Moreover, we’ve discovered the first line of defense, is to go within for the answers we seek.
Originally published in 2012
Life is full of surprises and unexpected events. It’s how you maneuver through life’s journey, with its twists and turns, that determines whether or not you live your best life and give of your best self.
Sidney Andrews – Bio
Sidney Andrews is an author, encouragement speaker and retired nurse with a degree in psychology. Her first book is a memoir titled “A Fall to New Heights.” Though it’s a provocative and compelling love story that speaks to an unexpected lifestyle change, the thrust of the book is spiritual in nature, as well as empowering, encouraging, inspiring and renewing.
Her second book is titled “Journey into Thought: Awakening to Spirit.” It speaks to the power of our thoughts and living from spirit
Sidney Andrews is a mother of three grown children. She is an author, encouragement speaker and contributing writer for examiner.com. You can view her articles at: http://www.examiner.com/spirituality-in-west-palm-beach/sidney-andrews
Her passions include writing to empower, encourage, inspire and renew the dreams, visions and goals of those searching for the answers to living their authentic truth and best lives. She loves spending time learning and growing spiritually with her partner,family and friends and values the solace that her 25×80 foot garden offers, when she’s caring for or just sitting about and taking it all in. Sidney retired to Port St. Lucie, FL nine years ago, with her partner, Kate, of thirty-nine years.
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